Thinking out and loud, going through my blue mazes of life.
Saturday, May 28, 2005
I am alive..!!
I had just finished watching “City of angles”.. Gosh!!
I’ve longed for that one, not for Meg or Nicolas, but for the sound track “Angle”.. that one fills me in with a shiver each time I got to hear it.. Unbelievable!
Until I saw it.. I SAW IT.. such a wafting fragrance of love,, u could feel it touching ur face as Meg passes away.. and when he was confessing with tears.. that was so heart breaking..
I wished I could go and sleep, but with om kalthom and one of her eternal enchanting melodies on the radio.. and GUESS WHAT its Friday night Cairo.. and after a while Ossama will rock your night with his masterpieces in “late cartoon”
“Why on earth am I doing that to myself.. why didn’t I watch Frankenstein instead?”
Believe it or not, as I was trying to shake these thoughts off my head, the lights went off!
For the 1st time in my life, I’ve never felt as desperate as I was,, I couldn’t get to my pc to space out these thoughts.. plus I’ve never felt as lonely as I was..
THAT WAS THE 1ST NIGHT THE LIGHTS WOULD GO OFF WITHOUT MY RADIO ON!!
Sadly, I did murder my friend, and all what is left, old paralyzed electric ones.. which SUCKS!!
I stood up, and walked in circles in the dark, as helpless as I could ever be.. then OFFFT.. I lied on bed , closed my eyes, and imagine those long nights I spent my, myself and my friends around.. my radio with some softies joining me from “the musical” and the universal melody from the sea I face..
I wished I could have the chance and vanish in both.. as the air would be getting all over me, in a magical and tender touch.. directly I’d be in a different world.. different timing and different myself..
Moments later, I stood up, and tried to down my thoughts on a piece of paper, with the help of a street lamp light joining my lonesome party with her faint beam of hope.
I gazed a little at the nothingness of life.. and life gazed back..
Till lights were to shine again..
Even before I would take in my breath, unconsciously, my hands were searching for a one I know his every bend and turn by heart.. I heard the voice of ossama and his masterpieces filling me in.. and I saw the warmth of life spreading around the place..
I took a deep relaxing breath in and thanked ALLAH I am alive.. I have my dearest friend on..
Time to go... 73's
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2 comments:
Gosh.. blue, your words are just penetrating to the heart.
BTW, a marvelous new look for the blog, I like it very much :)
u r welcomed ya moony..
thanks ALOT dear..
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