Friday, December 08, 2006

Can't talk..

Take to me.. show up and tell me everything is going to be OK!
Everything should be OK! Right?
We’ll go visit him again soon.. and he’ll be smiling as usual..
He’ll b smiling , but not showing any laughter.. sadness in his eyes.. ok,, don’t mind at all as long as he’d be ther for us..
We won’t get a word from what he’d be saying… I’ll nod my head to make him feel comfy and not to think he’s not understood, thought its true
I never caught a single word he said
But he’d return back safe and sound, right?
Tell me.. itell me its fine now.. and mother can go to bake him the cake… we’ll go visit him in the eid..
God please… not every eid some one passes…

I hate this life… I hate it…
Why do we live when every time we have to miss someone dear…..

Come around and lie to me.. I will believe you
I need to believe the lies…. I need to forget..
No, he’s not leaving that quick, was always strong and can make it life long.. he’s not leaving
He’ll return back come and we’ll visit him in the eid,, God I wont say I am studying, I promise,, and I’ll go visit him all day long and photo all his drawings… he never believed himself an artist,,, but he is one at heart,,
And.. I DON’T WANT TO BELIEVE HE IS LEAVING!
I feel helpless….. I feel terribly helpless…. Awfully helpless……..
And my mother.. I don’t wish to see her this way GOD please…. YA RAB…. YA RAB…

I will feel guilty if it ever happened and I didn’t visit him not in the hospital… but I can’t.. I really cant, and feel me a cowerd,, yes I am a cowerd ever since I saw him last time and can’t smile…. He’s condition was worst.. and I couldn’t see him this way.. I left!
And now……
YAAA RAB… YAAA RAB…. You are the only one to ask now… Help him for his kids and my mother…

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